This past weekend brought a lot of stress and irritation. I felt as if everything I offered up to others in love was disdained and criticized. I became so disappointed as my gifts and services were received poorly and wondered why I had even offered them in the first place. Venting was out of the question; everyone I wanted to turn to already cause some sort of hurt. I thought that I was going to have to face this vicious attack of character on my own.
I think about the story of our Savior. He wasn’t well received either. He was offered up as a gift to save humanity and just didn’t seem to be enough. Never mind His tender acts of mercy, forget the miracles of healing, His compassion was certainly criticized and no one seemed to heed the voice of God saying, “This is my son in whom I am well pleased.” Humanity just didn’t seem to care. Jesus was rejected but His purpose remained the same. His purpose was still made perfect in love. I’ve something to learn in this area.
I guess I feel that if I’m offering something to someone in love they should receive it in the same way. However, that is not always the case. Some well-intentioned recipients try to offer up a word of advice on how this act of service or gift should be provided. I encountered this with several people over the weekend of which I have the most profound respect. I was crushed at the audacity these people had to criticize what I offered. I felt minuscule and unappreciated.
What I’ve learned though is that it is not how the gift/service is received that is important. What is important is that it was received. My purpose was to do what I was called to do in a manner that God called me to do it. It doesn’t mean that I’ll receive accolades from those that I’ve given to. It only means that I’m being faithful to His will. Whatever I do I am to do to the glory of God. (Proverbs 16:3, Colossians 3:17, 23) Sometimes people will love me for it, and sometimes it will go unrecognized. It does not mean I am to believe every act will be successful in the eyes of humanity.
For a brief time I lost my faith in humanity believing that no one could possibly do or be enough. There will always be heartfelt acts that produce criticisms. Someone could have always done it better, but they didn’t. That’s the point. I can’t possibly depend on perfection being the answer to everything. Nothing would ever get done. I must continue to try even if the results are less than desirable. If I give up on humanity then I serve no purpose on this earth. I lack compassion and lose my capacity to truly love.
This weekend was a test of character. I very nearly failed. Well, in all actuality did fail. I failed to fully please those I intended to bless. But I didn’t fail the one that really matters. God saw what I was doing and was well pleased with what I attempted. That’s really all that matters. So instead of becoming overly sensitive to remarks on how I could have given or served better I will practice patience. And, yes, I will maintain my faith in humanity.
